Chapter 56
(Cottle's POV)

Well, at least it looks like both Apollo and the Old Man are finally starting to move past the 'shoot the messenger' phase, something this particular 'messenger' can certainly appreciate.

"We are going to have to talk to her about it," says Bill, sounding rather resigned.

"Yes, and you can pretty much count on her fighting us every step of the way," I warn him.

"She is going to kill me, isn't she?" groans Apollo.

"I don't think it will come to that."

"Would you at least let me talk to her first, give her some sort of heads up before you confront her? I mean, this is my mess so I should be the one to clean it up."

"I'll make sure to have a bed waiting for you," I say, shaking my head. I mean, I know viper pilots have a tendency to take stupid chances --after all no one with a reasonably developed sense of self-preservation would willingly step into the cockpit of one of those blasted things-- but even then I think that this may be taking things a little too far... though I can certainly understand where it is that Apollo is coming from.

"Don't even joke about it," he says, glaring at me.

"Believe me son, I'm not joking. I said that she probably won't kill you but that doesn't mean she is not going to hurt you. I can tell you that she is going to be pissed and a pissed Starbuck can be a dangerous thing."

"I know but I still have to do this."

"Just be careful. This is going to come out of nowhere as far as she is concerned and it is going to be a major shock."

"And that's why I want to do this, so that she doesn't feel like she just stepped into a frakking ambush," he insists.

"I get that and you may give her a heads up if you want but I'm not sure how much good that's going to do her... especially because I don't think letting her stew in it would do anyone any good. You may give her a heads up but we won't be putting this off because of that. We are going to have this talk with her and we are going to have it as soon as you are done," I warn him.

"But shouldn't we..."

"No," I interrupt him, already knowing what he is going to say. "I know that may seem harsh and I know you want to spare her but the fact is that you can't. The bottom line is that this confrontation is not going to get any easier no matter what we do and because of that putting it off would only serve to prolong the agony... in fact the less of a heads up that she has, the less of a chance she is going to have to rebuild her defenses and the less painful this is going to be in the long run."

"I hate this," he mutters.

"Yes, well, no one ever said that this was going to be easy. This is a mess -- and a toxic and foul smelling one at that-- and cleaning up a mess is, almost by definition, a messy experience," I remind him, even though that is only part of the problem here. The other part is, well... them. I know we can't put this off, I know this is something we are going to have to deal with but at the same time it is still too new as far as they are concerned and that can make this even worse.

I mean, right now I think I have a better shot at predicting what Starbuck's initial reaction is going to be than at predicting how the two of them are going to take it and I hate having so many frakking variables. I don't know what Kara is going to tell us --that is the big unknown-- I don't know how they are going to take it and I sure as hell don't know how Starbuck is going to react to their reactions. At times it feels almost as if I were juggling three patients at once here and, even though having multiple patients is something I am used to, having their progress be directly dependent on that of the other is not.

Even during an epidemic, when stopping the contagion itself is the top priority, each patient's progress remains independent of that of the others but that is not the case here. Right now my main concern has to do with the fact that any one of them could easily trigger a cascading effect... and even though I think I can trust Bill to keep his reactions to himself, the younger Adama is a different story altogether.

He loves her but at the same time she knows exactly which buttons to push to keep him at arm's length and I know that when it comes to this she is going to fight us with everything she's got. That can be a deadly combination especially because even though Starbuck is all but back, Kara still has a very long way to go. That means that we have to add yet another factor to what is already a fairly complicated equation, a factor that is specifically known for its unpredictability.